Many years ago, I was in a relationship, my girlfriend (now my ex) didn’t care about my seizures and that was comforting. There was one problem, I was not happy with myself at all. I was in a place called Depression Island population 1. I was sure the whole world was against me, felt sorry for myself, felt unloved, unwanted and simply sad that I had to fight this miserable condition by myself. The one person who loved me for me, could not understand me, in fact, I didn’t understand me either. After many years, she finally had it with me when I started looking for someone else to love me. This was when the life raft was now truly unavailable to me.
I was now worse off than ever, I had no desire to move forward and now hated myself for what I had done to a good person. After many years seeing the ships pass and not asking for help, I finally asked myself, “what am I doing to myself“? So after turning to my mother for help, she found a therapist who would help me.
It took two years of many therapy sessions, but I was finally able to build my own life raft and get off the miserable island. Thankfully, I now enjoy life more and joined a group to help people who are suffering from epilepsy.
The reason for this story is simple, if you have ever felt this way, just know, at least one other person has been in your shoes. Don’t forget to never stop fighting and know there are people who will love you, it is not always obvious to us, but they are around.
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